I am currently writing this entry in my head as I encounter yet another awkward first day of work. By my fifth company shift, you would have probably guessed that social interactions, series of introductions, office tours and company orientations would be a piece of cake for me. But no, not me. That’s not going to happen to the queen of awkward right here. Yes, fifth first day of work and I just turned twenty-three. Trust me, I would not be able to get past this stage until a few couple of weeks from now, and my pitcher-load of coffee intake and anxiety-eating is not of helping either.
In the midst of mental writing, I am being interrupted by the instruction of my upcoming tasks for this company. No complaints. I am just taking it all in. After all, that’s what life is all about. A list of meaningful obligations, all vying for our attention.
I started this blog when I was looking for things to do in my spare time of employment. In writing, I can deceive judgmental co-workers into thinking that I am actually working. What started out as an afternoon hobby turned out to be my outlet of passion and recreation. I find happiness in knowing that my useless thoughts could actually reach people all over the world. I find it very amusing that a person is willing to waste his precious few minutes for reading my crap, er, craft. Feedbacks and stats reassure me that I have provided simple entertainment to a lot of people. But above all, I realized it was me who got entertained the most.
This morning, I contemplated on being on hiatus. Unlike my previous job, what I do now requires actual work. I feared I may not have a lot of time on my hand. I shrugged off the idea immediately thinking a passionless life isn’t such a bright idea. I have the strength to stand being a corporate slave for awhile just as long as I can set aside time doing what I love to do. And unlike actual work, this does not have monetary rewards, just pure happiness.
Happiness is also what I felt when I found a PWD Restroom this morning as I enter my new workplace. It was the same kind of restroom I used in my previous office, another outlet where I can “let it all out” when I am “disabled” to work. In this moment of rambling and reflection, I also feel my stress-eating finally kicking in.
Now, excuse me while I wash myself off this restroom. I just had some weird lunch and…ugh forget it! I need to orient myself with this toilet.